Over the last week or so I have become increasingly aware of the strain that so many military families are currently under; it’s been keeping me up at night. I wanted to write a post to share the words of others in the hope that people can read and feel less alone, less isolated and more empowered to get through each day.
The current daily situation for everyone is one of uncertainty, changed routine and lack of knowledge of the future, but what does it feel like to be part of a military family right now?
For me and my family, we are coming to the end of a two year posting this summer. We were awaiting a posting order but obviously all postings are on hold right now so I imagine it will be later in the year we get some idea of what might happen. I know we are really lucky, it is a non deployable posting but my husband is still going into work each day. For us it is a manageable situation.
This is not the case for everyone. For many it’s tough for so many reasons.
I know how difficult I find a deployment. Past blogs will highlight to you my well being takes a battering (20 years of this life and I am STILL rubbish at it!) and that light at the end of tunnel is important to me; that goal gets me through. I now sit and imagine going through a deployment, then a global pandemic happens, lock down and my husband’s tour gets extended with no end date. Just imagine that. My heart actually hurts thinking about taking that in, explaining to children and carrying on.
I don’t have a magic wand, no one does. I don’t have the answers for you, no one does. What I can do is talk, be a voice for our military community at this time and make sure your troubles, your feelings, your anxieties are recognised…..because they matter. It is OK to not feel OK going through what you are.
So many are going through these kinds of situations. Below are a few deployment insights into the reality of being a military family through COVID-19. I have been sent so many of your stories, this really is just the tip of the iceberg, a scratch of the surface into deployment reality out there today.
These aren’t an easy read and I cried reading every word but I hope they help.
Another post is coming sharing some other stories with regards to uncertain times at home for military families. I also hope some of the resources from Little Troopers are helping, in particular maybe the Crafty Little Troopers sheets and Little Troopers Treasures story recording app.
Stay well, stay strong.
We’ve got this.
So so much love, Louise xxxxx
“My other half is currently deployed in the Gulf, due our first baby in 2 weeks and he’s not allowed home because of coronavirus. He has been away since early December and is not due home until mid July at the earliest.
It just feels rubbish, I know there is nothing anyone can do to get him home but it just makes me feel even more helpless than I already do having to be stuck inside on my own all day every day and now with a new baby”
~ Lauren ~
“As a military girlfriend who is a teacher, my whole world has been turned upside down. My partner has been deployed to the other side of the world to assist in the efforts, for months. We said goodbye thinking it would be 2 months and now it is looking like 6, potentially more.
I can’t go into school as it is closed – that is always my biggest distraction when he is away. I’m keeping busy and positive, like we all are. But please don’t say ‘this is a wonderful opportunity to spend time with your loved ones at home’ because for many of us, this is an impossible dream”
~ Dani ~
“My husband left for Estonia only a week or so before we went into lock down. It is just me and our two year old at home and I am finding it hard. I don’t drive and it is very strange having to ask welfare to help get me a food shop.
Just hoping it is over quickly”
~ Sarah ~
“Two kids under five, a full time career that I have only just started after leaving the army in 2018 and a husband who has just deployed for 6 months during the worst pandemic the world has ever seen.
It is beyond tough at this point”
~ Della ~
“My husband has been away in America since before the lock down commenced. I of course worry about him out there and it is an unknown when he will be home. All while I am looking after my little girl and run the house with no family support.
I worry also when he does come home what life will be like as it is likely he will be tasked straight away to work on COVID-19 tasks. Right now we are safe in this house, when he is home he will be in and out and who know what germs he might bring in”
~ Emma ~
“Coronavirus has made our life so emotional. Although we knew deployment was happening we thought it was May. It suddenly got brought forward. Kids finished school on the Thursday, hubby came home from work on Friday and deployed on Tuesday for 2 weeks lock down/isolation/quarantine and then he goes straight to Afghan until November with no RnR leave”
~ Shelley ~
“My husband has been deployed to a ship as part of the COVID-19 resilience programme. Deployments are always hard but I deal with them by having my family close and being busy with work. I can’t go and spend any time with my family.
I have never felt so lonely during a deployment in my life”
~ Poppy ~
Girls, you are amazing so truly amazing.
This is for you xx
This post has made me feel so much better
Been feeling really alone 😢 not sure we’re to ask for help from, given thousands worse than us, I don’t really need help just to hear others understand.
My husband is doing 6 months in Falklands, he was supposed to be home for R&R in May been counting down the days, after that it was 6 weeks he would be home. R&R is cancelled he reckons he won’t be home until at least August ☹️
My little girl is 18 month, we are missing our little family